Wow! The world seems to be pretty divided right now. Just last night I heard Democrats screaming that the Republicans are the problem with America, and then I heard Republicans screaming the Democrats are the problem. Four years ago I heard that President Trump will make America great again. And twelve years ago I was told that President Obama would make America great again. So which is it?
From where I’m sitting (I’m an Independent. I don’t need a party to tell me what to think, I can think for myself, and you should too), both sides, and all Americans want the same things. Good income, safe neighborhood, strong house, choice of good food, respect from others, and hope. If you actually read the Republican and Democrat platforms they are almost identical on intent, but worded differently. Here is the problem; we all have similar basic wants, both parties tell us they want us to have our basic wants, so why are we fighting about it?
You might be thinking that the Democrats are only helping the poor, and the minorities. And Republicans only care about the rich and powerful. Well here’s the thing, 90% of politicians in our government, ARE MILLIONAIRES. Does someone who has every need and most wants met know what the person making $10,000, $30,000 even $100,000 a year needs or wants? There is a huge disconnect, and yet we the 98% fight with each other over which party loves us more. I will use president Biden as my example. He has been a democrat leader for 47 years, he is paid by our tax dollars. HOW DID HE BECOME A MILLIONAIRE? Sorry I got sidetracked, Biden has spent 47 years working for us and nothing has changed except his families bank accounts. But it’s not just Biden. It is 90% of our leaders.
Everything has two sides, it takes two to tango, two to fight, two to create life. I believe that you can attribute this to a law of the universe known as the law of duality. Which states that everything has an opposite. Light – dark, big – little, or up – down. Our emotions also operate on this law. As in happy – sad, or love – hate. Now I want you to think about this; at what point does hot become cold? Or when does light become dark? To a nocturnal animal nighttime is bright as day. However to you and me it seems dark. I am freezing when the temperature drops below 60°, I live in South Florida where thankfully it doesn’t drop that low very often. But if you live in Canada it may feel extremely hot at 60°. I’m not bad for feeling cold, and Canadians aren’t bad for feeling hot.
The point I’m trying to make is that we all see the same things in different ways. Which is exactly how the universe is designed. We are normal, we are operating just as the universe intended. Once you realize that we are all the same, have similar wants and needs, and our differences have been designed by God, Allah, the Universe, or whatever you believe created us. Then you can see our differences as blessings from a creator, and open your mind to other points of view. We will all see, feel and think differently. You will never think exactly as I think. It is impossible. We may have similar beliefs but we will never think exactly alike, because we have had a different set of life experiences, and that’s ok. We can be different and still be friends
We all need to take a step back and look at each other as if we are one and the same, because we are! The only way to become one country, one world, one universe is by embracing our differences. By being grateful for our differences and respecting our differences.
I’m sure you’ve heard of The Golden Rule? Do unto others as you would do unto me. Ie: treat people, animals, plants the way you want to be treated. You want to be treated with respect, treat others with respect. You want happy cashiers at the store? Treat them with happiness, want to be liked, be likeable.
I’m sure you’ve heard all of this before, it’s not new information. We all want to be treated with respect, we all need to be accepting of our differences, we all just wanna get along. So, as Nike™ says, “JUST DO IT”! Start getting along! Start showing respect! Begin the process by you sharing happiness, love and respect, and then watch how those same things come back to you.
If we all do this the world would be an amazing place. After all if variety is the spice of life, then let’s embrace our own individual variety! Let’s change the world by changing ourselves.
Finishing up The Happiness Effect, my latest book, and I thought I would share a chapter that could help you clean out old unwanted issues in your life. I hope you enjoy it. PLEASE leave some comments let me know what you think. How do you maintain happiness everyday? What are your gratitude rituals? Jump in and start a conversation ✌️💚😁🙏
“That’s the nice thing about being human. We only have one life, but we can choose what kind of story it’s going to be.”. Rick Riordan
Rewriting your story
Another great secret to a positive happy life, is to clear out negative feelings from your past. All of those stories contain the emotions that you felt at the time. Your brain has stored every emotion you have ever had. All the stories from your past, both the good and the not so good, have been recorded in your subconscious mind, and all of those emotions are still directing your life today. Are you being guided by past negativity that continues to play out in the present, and will steer your future as well? Or, is your past emotional library filled with happiness, gratitude, learning, growing and abundance? Your past emotions are sometimes buried beneath a lot of garbage. You will have to throw out some of the garbage you’ve allowed yourself to believe if you want to rewrite your history in positivity. You probably don’t view your life story as all roses and unicorns, so in order to be absolutely filled with consistent happiness, you have to find the good in ALL past experiences. We’ve all had days, or even years where things were tough. Maybe you lost a job, or your house. Maybe you feel a family member did you wrong and you can’t forgive them. Maybe you have had a loved one pass away. These can all be devastating to our present lives. The fact that we have all lived through tough times should comfort you knowing that you are not alone. Every human being has been hit by tough times, and most of us get through it just fine. Those that know that life has to change for the better, and plan their recovery, will get through the challenges with ease. The most successful people will accept the setback, and then plan their comeback. You can overcome any negative feelings that you have ever had, and if you want to be consistently happy you must learn how to do this.
Only you have the power to rewrite your story the way you want it to be told. That’s very exciting and should have you jumping up and down doing a happy dance. You should be floating on air because you know that you are in total control of your life, past, present and future, and you control how you want to perceive it all. I know you can do this because I know you have the confidence to overcome all negativity because today… you are here reading this book, and things are about to get a lot better for your life!
The simple truth is that you must find the good out of every experience in your past. You need to look back through your life and replay every single memory with a happy ending. For example; your parents left you when you were eight years old, sending you to foster care. This devastated you, it has made you feel unloved your whole life, and you are still blaming every challenge you face on that experience. Now when you replay your life you realize that because of this perceived misfortune, you met your best friend in foster care, and you both are still best friends today. Certainly losing our parents at a young age would be devastating. Many people would see that as an excuse for giving up, or accepting mediocrity. However when you focus on what was the happy ending, and realize that the adversity made you stronger, and allowed you to find your best friend, the whole experience changes into a positive life adventure. In this example you found your life long friend because of the loss you experienced. If you shift your perception of events this becomes a very lucky event that changed your life for the best.
Another example could be that a girl or guy broke your heart in ninth grade. So now you don’t get close to anyone, and this makes you feel very lonely. Now as you reverse the loss into a found, you realize that if you didn’t break up with that partner, you wouldn’t have gone to college where you met your business partner, and now you’re both worth millions.
You really need to look back and see every moment of your life as having a positive outcome. Sometimes these memories have been buried for years, and we don’t want to bring them to the surface. They are scary, they may make you face fears you don’t even know you have. But in order to re-imagine your life, and create the happiness effect that will last, you will need to be fearless, face past perceived negative experiences, and replay them in a positive way until you can actually feel joy when you think about them. The only way to reach a completely happy and balanced life is to view your life as lucky, happy, positive and abundant. Earlier we talked about the fact that we tend to be what we believe, or that we are what we think we are. This is excellent news because after you spend some time rewriting your life history with an only positive twist, you will begin to wonder why you saw some events as horribly negative. Yes, they were challenging, but you have overcome them with determined positivity.
As you rewrite more of your life stories, you will begin to connect the dots that make up your life picture. When you start replaying life as a positive journey, you will see that the perceived negative experiences created a learning environment, allowing you to grow, be a more confident and stronger person. The saying “what doesn’t kill you, makes you stronger” is true. Every single experience, no matter how bad you feel it was, made you a better person.
As you practice more, and really try to experience your past life as a happy, good, growing experience you will begin feeling a sense of joy, optimism and happiness everyday. Because you will begin to expect happiness and growth because that’s how your life has always been. The better you can get at this mental shift, the more consistently happy your life will become. You will be amazed at how you are able to look back at everyday in your past and see how it really was ALL GOOD. If your life has been all good, then you will be confident that your life will always be, all good. As the happiness effect takes hold, you will begin to see more happy experiences and more abundance show up in your life. It is like magic. Your new outlook and positive happy mindset will bring you abundance without any other effort on your part, that is so cool!
Many of you may feel overwhelmed at the thought of changing a family members death into a positive experience. I agree that it sounds daunting. However as you begin shifting to a happiness mindset on a daily basis, you will become more experienced, and comfortable replaying past events in the same way. Like everything in life, it takes a little patience and daily intentional practice.
One good way to begin seeing the positive side of things while increasing your gratitude towards life, is to daily use a “gratitude charm”. You simply need to find a rock, a pin, or some talisman to hold at night before going to bed. I use a polished rock that was in the bucket I grew my first turmeric in. While holding your “gratitude charm” replaying the events of the day, and saying thank you for all the good that happened that day. You can say it out loud, or silently in your mind, whatever makes you “feel” the gratitude more fully. Go back through your entire day and replay each event so that each one ends positively, and say thank you. If during the day you learned something new, even if it was painful, that is a positive for your life. Learning, even when painful forces you to grow. And just like nature we need to be always growing. When you are not growing, or moving forward, you are dying and moving backwards. Be grateful for every experience you recieve, and then move on.
However, you do need to actually feel emotionally grateful for your entire day, adding feelings to your gratitude, cements the experience in your mind. And if you remember, your subconscious mind will have to believe what you consciously tell it. When you can emotionally feel grateful for every experience, everyday, your abundance and satisfaction with life will explode.
I should also let you know that how you start your day will dictate how your day will go. Instead of waking up with negative news, email, or doubt and worry, wake up with gratitude. If three minutes of negative news can ruin your day. Just imagine what five minutes of being thankful can do for your day. When you wake up, take a few minutes and just say thank you for whatever comes to mind. Setting your day up with gratitude will drastically improve how your day is experienced.
For the next thirty days I recommend that you write down at least five things you are thankful for everyday. You can do this anytime during the day, when something you see brings a happiness or grateful feeling, write it down. After thirty days you will be blown away at how much abundance there already is, all around you. Start and end your days with gratitude. The more you are able to do this, the faster your life will become consistently happy, as I’ve said a few times… It’s like magic.
As you begin to see how much you have to be grateful for everyday, it will make rewriting your life’s history easier. When a challenge hits you in the present day, and then you replay that event in a positive way that evening, you will begin to see new ways of viewing your past in a positive light as well. Practice makes perfect, but you should not force it. Try to make it a fun experience just seeing good in things. Learn to laugh at yourself, life and the driver who just cut you off.
Spend some time practicing rewriting your past and see what happens. Once you start changing your history to a positive, grateful one, it will begin forcing your future to be more of the same. If your life has always been about positivity, you can expect your future will be good as well. Happiness follows happiness, and maybe even better, abundance follows happiness too.
Social distancing INCREASES the risk of mortality by 29%.
We are in some crazy times, with the covid19 pandemic creating an uneasy, confused feeling among many of us. Many of us are laid off from our jobs. Furloughed, a new word in my vocabulary which I have learned to use. Many of us have no idea when we can work and provide for our families. We are being forced to rely on handouts from the government for the first time in our lives. Creating a stressful, uneasy feeling in our lives. Just ask any Venezuelan how it feels when the government runs out of money to give, and there are still no jobs.
This is creating a very stressful situation for most people. The emotions that come with having no control over your life can be debilitating. Six of the top ten causes of death worldwide are related to stress. I guess you could say stress can be attributed to around 30 million deaths a year worldwide (stats from World Health Organization website) that’s a lot of dead folks. This COVID-19 even without social distancing may kill a million or two at most. (just speculation).
I’m sharing that statistic with you because being forced to stay away from others, is very likely creating more problems for us than it is solving. It is creating high amounts of stress. As a matter of fact according to scientific literature by Julianne Holt-Lunstad, a research psychologist at Brigham Young University, and other colleagues determined that chronic social isolation increases the risk of mortality by 29%. On top of that, fear has been bred by the media, and our leaders, and that is creating major anxiety for many people. We could see many people die. Not from a virus, but from complications and stress caused by social distancing.
I would bet that many of you don’t know that the sense of touch is the first sense to develop in the womb. The sense of feeling, or touch is so important for a baby’s development that nature has ensured that the sense of touch comes first. It is also the first sense to become fully developed. Obviously this is a pretty important part of life!
For those of us that enjoy kissing, a baby’s mouth (and yours) is more sensitive to touch than anywhere else on the body. Probably why everything a baby touches, goes into their mouth. They are learning how things feel everytime they taste something. A child’s development relies heavily on touch. It has been proven that adolescents that receive hugs are generally better adjusted to society, have higher test scores, more friends and many other advantages over children who are touch neglected.
As we get older touching continues to be a major benefit to our lives. Hugging another human has been proven to reduce blood pressure, which then improves your entire cardiovascular system. Hugging increases serotonin, dopamine, and oxytocin (the happy hormones) in our brains. This creates an anti-aging, antidepressant, environment in our minds.
Hugging has been proven to actually improve our immune system, prevent virus infection, and when infected hugging reduces the length of sickness symptoms.
Hugging can, and will reduce stress. Have you ever seen someone hyperventilating, or crying hysterically and then being held lovingly by someone? Did you notice how quickly the crying subsided after the hug started? We could talk about babies again and point out how babies love to be held when they are crying, they need to be held. They need to actually FEEL the love. Grown-ups are no different. We need to feel the love.
Finally hugging is a pain reliever. Think of the young kid who gets hurt playing sports. A parent or coach gives the child a hug and walla, the pain subsides. You bonk your head on the table, your partner hugs you, the pain slowly fades. #HUGSHEAL they really do.
COVID-19 is killing people, separation anxiety and lack of social contact may kill people as well.
My uneducated, non-medical advice is to go out and hug someone, and feel the love. Face adversity and fear head on. After all it’s a cold we are shying from. Wash your hands and face, put on clean clothes, wear a mask if you or someone you’re with is high risk, then HUG each other and feel the love. It is FREE healthcare after all.